Two bits relating to Rock 'n Roll...

1. Verbal exchange between my husband and Ollie (my 3YO) yesterday:

Ollie (squinting her eyes & holding up fists): You want a piece of me?
My husband: Yeah, I want a piece of you.
Ollie: Rock 'n roll!

2. One of my (former) favorite local radio stations, 106.1 WRDU has been "The Home of Rock 'n Roll" for some 20 years. Saturday, I awoke to country music rather than "the best of Bob & Tom". I blew it off, thinking one of the kids had dicked around with the radio and changed the channel. Much to my dismay, I awoke this morning to more country music and some John Boy & Billy shit. As I lay there wondering what station it was, the station ID message came on and proclaimed it to be 106.1 "The New Rooster". WTF??? First of all, the ratio of country to rock stations was already a bit lopsided - I mean, hello! I know we're in the South, but we don't all listen to country music exclusively. Not that I have anything against country music. Love it, in fact. However, as previously noted we have plenty of country stations and precious few Classic Rock stations. And I need a daily dose of Led Zeppelin, Eagles, Bob Seger, etc. Second of all, what the f*** does a rooster have to do with music? I get the country/farm reference but how much more redneck can you get? Then I remembered, 106.1 is owned by ClearChannel now. Stupid bastards.

Thought of you when I saw this...

No, seriously. And I'm not talking about the fact that I came perilously close to actually buying a shirt with pumpkins on it today at Kohl's. Although that is worrisome, too. No, my problem is that my adult ADD is getting worse by the minute. Example? As I was checking my e-mail just moments ago, I thought of something that I needed to look up on the Internet. In the time it took for Internet Explorer to open (which, frankly, was not that long) I got sidetracked and totally forgot what I needed to look up. The worst part is that I think it was actually something important, not just my regular surfing to entertain myself. One could argue that it must not have been that important if I couldn't remember what it was, which may be true. In fact, that sounds good. I'll go with that for now.

In case I haven't mentioned it before, I LOATHE Happy Meal toys. Not just the ones from McDonald's (which I'm sure has trademarked the term "Happy Meal" and would collect a nickel every time someone said it if they could) but almost all the fast food joints. Chick Fil-A actually gives away educational stuff, so they're okay. The problem there is that Grover and Ollie are far more interested in the cartoon characters than learning about Thomas Edison's invention of the light bulb. All the other crap, however, is just that - crap - some stupid plastic piece of junk that makes some sort of annoying noise or worse, incites my children to make noise. I have this plan to create an online petition to ban Happy Meal toys and replace them with something useful, like windshield washer fluid. I'll do that in my "spare" time. HA!

We visited McDonald's the other night after getting our hair cut and the girls got (what else?) Happy Meals that contained quite possibly the most annoying toy yet. It's cleverly disguised as a tie-in to the DVD release of The Little Mermaid (I guess McDonald's and Disney didn't get enough money the first time around so they're milking the cash cow again) but it's really from the devil. It's this little plastic necklace - actually it's more like a choker - with a seashell and a picture of Ariel (the title character) that you press to hear sound. The instructions, which contain no actual words but pictures to show how to work the toy (like a monkey couldn't figure this one out), indicate that when you press the button, it plays music. At least, that's what I assumed from the little music notes printed on the graphics. Well, we all know what happens when we assume so I'll save that speech. What actually happens when you press the button is that a female voice says "Isn't it fantastic?" in a very breathy voice (think Marilyn Monroe singing "Happy Birthday" to JFK). It's more than just irritating (after all, Grover and Ollie can't just push it once - I think there's a little kid rule about pushing buttons a minimum of 100 times); it's actually disturbing. I mean, that voice is something else. If it had a different picture with it, I'd swear it was soft-core porn. I intend to complain to McDonald's about this one... right after I set up that online petition.

A local church is having a Diet Coke/Mentos rocket contest on Sunday. What an ingenious way to get people (especially young ones) to come to church. Of course, the heathens like me will go for the fun and leave before it gets serious...