I was all set to vent my irritation about the ridiculous sense of entitlement possessed by so many Americans - as evidenced by their willingness to demand action on the part of the federal government concerning high gas prices and unwillingness to part with their gas-guzzling, environment-killing SUV status symbols - however, I find that I get so incensed by the topic that I can't seem to formulate a complete sentence, so I've abandoned that topic in favor of something simpler.

For the second Sunday in a row, I've been stricken with a nasty "illness" comprised mostly of severe nausea (I'll spare you the other symptoms). Now, I think I can rule out a viral or bacterial infection because it's highly improbable that a virus or bacterium would selectively choose to rear its ugly head seven days apart. Then again, I'm not a biologist so who knows? My original hypothesis was that since both incidents of unwellness happened on Sunday, God is trying to remind me that I should be in church. Then again, God is pretty busy and probably doesn't have time to deal with me and my religious habits or lack thereof. The more likely option is that I had some kind of reaction to greasy food which I shouldn't have been eating. Last Saturday it was heavily buttered popcorn (and lots of it) at the movies, the likes of which I haven't seen since I volunteered at The Paradise Theatre where the popcorn was popped in glorious solidified coconut oil and topped with REAL butter. Then, last night I indulged in chicken scaloppine from a local bistro. Delicious, but the butter quotient was more than high - it was toxic (obviously). Why is food that tastes so good so bad for you???

I get regular e-mail updates from the Consumer Product Safety Commission informing me of product recalls. Seeing as I have children and an alarming number of children's products are frequently recalled, I felt it prudent to subscribe to their list. So the e-mail I get today has the following alert:

"Slingshots Recalled by Daisy Manufacturing Due to Risk of Serious Eye Injury"

DUH!?!

I hope you all exercised your constitutional right to vote today if elections were held in your area. I certainly did. Not that there was a whole lot to vote for, but at least I can say I've fulfilled my civic responsibilty. Okay, so I just want to be able to bitch about the government some more knowing that I have the "I voted" card in my back pocket.

Since we're all so sleep-deprived - speaking of course in the collective "we" of this great nation - this particular link may be of interest. It's from the BBC website, specifically the section on sleep as it relates to the human body and mind. They tell you to take the test while in your "normal" state of wakefulness and then take it again after your daily dose of caffeine (coffee, tea, Mountain Dew, whatever...) and note the difference in reaction time. Anyway, here it is - The Sheep Dash. The best I did was Ambling Armadillo and that was after a large (and delicious) sweet tea from McDonald's. I'll have to try again after a visit to Starbucks or Taco Bell.

Post a comment and let me know how you did. I'm going to bed now.

Have you ever wondered at what precise point you go from "young" to "old"? I've figured it out. When you start seeing healthcare providers that are younger than you, that's it. You're officially "old". You may prefer the term "middle-aged" but I choose not to sugar-coat things - it just makes for a bigger disappointment down the road. I have a number of medical "issues" (hypochondria being at the top of the list) that require an obscene number of doctor visits, much to my health insurance company's dismay, no doubt. Among my own healthcare providers younger than I, I count a dentist, podiatrist, physical therapist and the obstetrician that delivered Ollie. And that's just off the top of my head - I'm sure if I dedicated more thought to it, I could come up with a few more, but it's late and I'm tired. Now, there are those among you (ah-hem... BA, krudser, Fishmonger) that would say the fact that I see a podiatrist single-handedly qualifies me for senior citizenry. To you, I say "pppbbbbtttthhhhh"